E.C Tubb - Spectrum of a Forgotten Sun

"Face him in public," murmured the boy. "Warn him first and then-"

"You don't give any warnings," snapped Dumarest impatiently. "He isn't a friend. He isn't anything but an animal you have to kill before he kills you. So kill him." He added, more gently, "You'll only have to do it once, Navalok. Just let the others see that you don't intend to play their game according to their rules and you might have a chance. It's your life, remember. Don't throw it away."

"I won't, Earl. I'll do as you say-if I can."

He would try and either success or the dead-weight of accepted custom would lead to his death, but Dumarest had done his best and could do no more. Now it was the turn of the other to give.

"I need a raft, Navalok. Can you get me one?"

"No, Earl, you need-"

"An accepted member of the House." Dumarest was sharp. "You have the right, now, and I want to go to town. Will you take me?"

They left as dusk softened the outlines of the hills and early stars began to glimmer in the skies. The boy was silent, sitting hunched and thoughtful beside Dumarest as he sent the raft skimming low and straight towards the field. It was empty of vessels as he'd known and, setting down the raft, Dumarest dropped over the side.

"Thank you, Navalok."

"Shall I wait for you, Earl?"

"No."

"You're spending the night here?" The boy looked at the deserted streets, the sombre bulk of shadowed buildings. All were dark aside from the hotel from which came glimmers of light and the sound of thin, reedy music. "Earl?"

Dumarest said, "Take the raft back to the House. Goodbye, Navalok."

He walked to the hotel without looking back, thrusting open the door and stepping into a long, narrow room. It was almost empty, a scatter of men wearing various liveries sitting at small, round tables. At the far end a staircase rose to the upper rooms. On a low dais an old man blew into a bagged flute his gnarled fingers caressing a series of holes.

"Your pleasure, sir?" A squat man wearing a greasy tunic had stepped from behind a low counter. "My House is honored. Some wine?"

"You have rooms?"

"The choice of a score. Always it is the same until a ship arrives. But first, some wine?"

It was rough, holding the tang of smoke and metal, too acid for his taste and a fitting accompaniment to the music.

As he refilled the glass the squat man said, "A vessel should be calling here soon. The Ahdil is about due and, naturally, there could be others. A matter of days only, but waiting can be tedious if only for a single night, so if you'd rather not be alone?"

His glance as he posed the question was suggestive.

"No," said Dumarest. "All I want is a room."

It was small, cramped, the bed sagging, the floor of bare, unpolished wood, but it was cheap and would serve. During the night Dephine came to join him.

* * * * *

She entered like a ghost to stand by the door, looking at Dumarest who, roused by the creak of wood, had risen and was facing her, the naked blade of the knife in his hand glimmering in the starlight coming through the narrow window.

He said, quietly, "Why are you here?"

"Can't you guess, Earl?"

"Navalok-"

Told me. He had no choice. He is waiting below with the raft."

"You shouldn't have come. Your reputation-"

"To hell with that!" Long legs carried her over the space between them. "Do you suppose I care what others think? My life is with you, Earl. With you-not those worshipers of tradition. Couldn't you smell the dust in the House? Feel the cobwebs brush against your face in the passages and halls? The past dominates everything they do, but I live for the present. I long for the future. Our future, my darling. Ours!"

She moved a little and illusion transformed her, the robe she wore gleaming with the whiteness of a shroud, the mane of hair, bleached by the starlight, turning to silver, even the hollow contours of her cheeks taking on an elfin quality, a delicacy which collapsed time and space and made a fragment of the past suddenly real.

Derai!

But she was long gone, long dead, lost on a lonely world, dust now, all her beauty spent. As others were lost and with them their dreams of happiness. As Kalin was lost.

But, always, the search for Earth remained.

Dumarest looked at the knife in his hand. As he put it down Dephine said, flatly, "You came here to wait for a ship. You want to leave. But why, Earl? Why?"

"This isn't my world, Dephine."

"And not really mine, now. But we could be happy here. There is a place I know, one I used to visit as a child. There is a lake and a house and we could be alone. Alone and happy, Earl, that I promise you. I would be everything to you-give you all any man could ever need."

A lamp stood on a low table against the wall. Dumarest lit it and watched as the flame crawled up the wick to fill the room with a warm and yellow light. One which banished the illusions as if there had been ghosts running before the newly risen sun. Auburn hair, not silver; an embroidered robe, not a shroud; a strongly determined face; not the childish weakness of the one he had known. Not Derai and, aside from the slight resemblance of the hair, not Kalin.

"I saved your life, Earl," said Dephine softly. "Have you forgotten that?"

"No."

"And you owe me something. There are cultures in which once a man admits to this his life is no longer his. It belongs to the one who has saved it."

"And there are others which holds that if a man saves the life of another he is responsible for whatever that man later does." Dumarest shrugged. "Take your pick, Dephine, which do you choose?"

"Neither-and don't make me feel so ashamed, Earl. Do you think it easy for me to plead? I am a Keturah and we have our pride. But I need you. I can't let you go. You just can't walk away and leave me." Her voice grew a little ragged. "You spoke of reputation-well, consider it. Don't shame me before my Family. They think we plan to get married. At least go through the ceremony and give me the respect they hold so important. What would it matter to you? A few days, a couple of weeks at the most Earl, would it be so hard?"

She stepped close before he could answer, her arms circling his neck, the warmth of her body a fever beneath her clothing.

"Please, darling." Her voice was a seductive murmur, music to enhance the scent of her hair, the perfume of her flesh. "You are too kind to be so cruel as to leave me so soon. Give me a little time and then, if you want, we can leave together. There will be money and we can travel in luxury. You and I as one, darling, together for as long as you want. For as long as you need me. And you do need me, Earl. You need me as I need you. My love! Oh, my love!"

Chapter Sixteen

Dawn broke with a light wind and gusting ram, chill drops which clung to the window and dressed the panes with pearls. Dumarest rose and looked down at the sleeping woman. Sprawled on the bed, her hair spread in an auburn cloud on the pillow, the long, lissom lines of her figure relaxed in satiation, she looked older than when awake and dressed. A maturity which had little to do with the passage of years. More than time had impressed the tiny mesh of lines at the corner of each eye, the slight pucker of flesh running from nose to mouth, the hardness of the jaw and brows.

Then her eyes opened and, suddenly, the face was no longer a bitter mask but that of a vibrant and lovely woman.

"Earl!" She stretched, arching her body, hands lifted, nails gleaming in the early morning light. "I had such pleasant dreams. We were married and we had a child, a son who looked just like you. We'd gone on a picnic and an animal came towards us and we all rode on its back into a field full of tall grass and wonderful flowers. Do dreams mean anything, darling? I knew a woman once who swore they did. To her a bad dream meant a bad day and when she had one she'd write it all down on a piece of paper covered with inscribed charms and burn it. She'd do that before receiving-well, before starting her day."

"And did it work?"

"Who knows? She was young and to the young all things are forgiven." She stretched again and he could see the neat row of bone where her rib-cage showed beneath the taut skin. Ridges broken only by the mounds of her breasts. A lithe figure, one suited to hardship, but one he was sure which had been cosseted in youth. "Did you dream, Earl?"

"A little." A lie, he had lain wakeful through the night.

"Nice dreams?"

"Until they were broken. A ship landed an hour before dawn."

"A ship?" For a moment she stared blankly at him and then, abruptly, surged upright. "A ship? From where?"

"I don't know," he said patiently. "I haven't been out yet. All I know is that a ship landed and is now standing on the field. And what does it matter where it came from?"

"As long as it will take you away from Emijar?"

"Yes."

"You say that!" Her eyes widened to show a rim of white around each his. "After what we've been to each other! What you promised! Earl, I love you. You can't leave me now. You can't. Not after last night."

A woman's illogic, they had been lovers since leaving Shallah-why should the present incident carry such importance?

He said, quietly, "I'm not going to argue with you, Dephine. We both know what I promised. Anyway, why be upset? All I want to do is to take a look at the ship."

"Is that why you're up and dressed? Earl! You can't leave me! I won't let you!"

He backed as she lunged towards him, feeling the touch and scrape of her metal nails on his face, the impact too light to have broken the skin. His own hand lifted, came down to slap her cheek.

"Keep those damned nails to yourself! I warned you what I'd do if you used them against me again!"

"Earl, I'm sorry!" Tears filled her eyes, falling as she turned to splash against her naked thighs. "I couldn't help it. It's just that the very thought of losing you makes me desperate. Please try to understand. I'm in love with you. For God's sake, man, don't you realize what that means?"

Sweetness and pain, the ineffable joy of affection and the haunting fear of loss. The vulnerability of total surrender. The willing discarding of all defenses and the embracing of the unknown. How easy to hurt a creature who loves. A word, a sneer, a curt gesture, a momentary indifference. How easy to suffer anguish.

How quickly to lose the paradise of the mind and senses.

He said, thickly, "Yes, Dephine, I know what it means."

"Then you forgive me?"

"I forgive you. Get up and get dressed and join me below. If I'm not there wait for me."

"You'll wait for me? You promise?"

"The ship won't be leaving yet," he reminded her. "And if Navalok's still waiting he'll be hungry."

* * * * *

The boy sat in the lower room, his face peaked, his lips blue as he hunched before a smoking fire. A devoted attendant who had spent the night in the raft, entering the hotel only at dawn.

"I saw the ship land, Earl," he said. "The raft is ready if you want to use it."

"I won't."

"But-" His eyes moved towards the stairs. "I thought that you and the Lady Dephine would be traveling back to the House."

"Before you go anywhere you need to eat." Dumarest went in search of the owner and gave him instructions. To Navalok he said, "I've ordered food to be served. When Dephine comes down have her eat breakfast. Have a good meal now."

He left the boy hugging a steaming mug of tisane, stepping outside and feeling the chill drive of rain. The ship rested on the field, a twin to the one which had brought him to Emijar. The port was open and the ramp was down but there were no signs of anyone loading. The rain could have delayed the discharge of any cargo the ship may have carried and it was too early for workers to be at the warehouses.